Moving forward

Thanks for all the lovely encouraging comments here and on FB.  I'm more upbeat about the whole injury thing now.  But two weeks of relative inactivity haven't been easy.  My appetite hasn't decreased unfortunately and I suspect I may end up looking like a sumo wrestler if I'm not careful.  If the weather was better I'd be happily munching my way through salad but when it's this cold my body is convinced it needs to lay down fat stores to get me through the winter!

But I'm keeping busy.  Knitting, quilting, gardening, reading (Chris Hoy autobiography) and there's always stuff to be done round this old house.  It looks like the housing market won't be improving any time soon so I need to prepare for another winter here. That will keep me occupied and out of mischief.

I've also found 4 teaching jobs within my speciality so I've been busy filling in application forms.  Surely one of them will come my way?  Fingers crossed and universe been asked.

I loved this quote Fi left on FB. "Success is not measured by heights attained but by obstacles overcome. We're going to pass through many obstacles in our lives: good days, bad days. But the successful person will overcome those obstacles and constantly move forward"  Bruce Jenner

I'm moving forward :-)

Day 3 aka Game Over

Day 3 began with a lie in.  Until 6.30am! I expected to be stiff and sore so wasn't surprised to find I could barely move. I genuinely hadn't looked at the day's programme (cos I would freak!) so when I found out it was a 5 mile pre breakfast run I panicked.  But a quick test run up and down the road and a liberal amount of Biofreeze on my lower back convinced me I was up for it.  I really was.

And the first couple of miles through knee deep puddles and muddy trail were ok.  I was actually enjoying being out in the pissing down rain.  And managing to run up all the hills!  And then my knee began to get sore.  Achey at first, then twangy.  Then so painful, I had to stop running.  It was a long tearful walk back to the car.

The short version is that I simply couldn't take part in any more exercise.  So I came home, 2 days early.  My knee puffed up nicely and I limped around the house in a foul mood, periodically sitting with a bag o' frozen peas on it.  A trip to the physio suggests I haven't torn or damaged anything but there is major inflammation. Treatment is rest for a couple of weeks and start back very slowly.  He also suggested I'm pushing my body too much.

I haven't been able to blog about it until now because I was so angry. Angry that my race plans have been thwarted again.  Every time I increase my levels of training I get ill or get injured.  It feels like I'm destined not to do a triathlon or half marathon this year.

So even though I didn't complete Fit Camp I learned a lot.  I pushed myself harder and further in one day than I've ever been able to do.  I still let the crap in my head stop me from believing in myself but I'm more aware of it and I'm working on it.

I have no idea what to do now.  I don't have a goal to work towards except don't gain weight!  How can I stay motivated when I can't train?

Day 2

I got up in time (just) for a pre breakfast 3 mile run and beach workout.  Stunning location but eaten alive by the dreaded midges!!

Breakfast was followed by a 5 mile trail walk.

Lunch was followed by a 20 mile mountain bike ride on trails, closely followed by an upper body circuit session.

And rounded off with a collapse into the hot tub!!  It was hot and bubbly!!!

I have never done so much exercise in one day.  I discovered a few more things about myself.  I'm a big scaredy cat going downhill on a bike!  I was constantly told to get my hands off the brakes.  And true to form I struggled going uphill as well.  Encouragement in the form of "PEDAL, PEDAL, PEDAL" had little effect on my dead legs. No problem, I got shoved up from behind. And when that wasn't fast enough I was dragged up!!

I discovered that when you run out of energy it means you haven't eaten enough.  Ooops!  Forgot I had stuff in my backpack.

And I fell off. THREE times!  Once into the river, once going up a hill and once at the side of the main road (that one really hurt!)

But I kinda enjoyed (most) of it.  Although I don't half ache all over!

Day 1

It might be a pretty ski lodge with Wifi, outdoor hot tub and a wood burning stove but it may well be the scene of my demise.

Boot Camp (cunningly renamed Fit Camp!!) has commenced.  A deceptively leisurely evening arrival was swiftly followed by a short sharp shock in the form of tomorrow's schedule!  A 6.30am pre breakfast run and beach workout, followed by breakfast, followed by a 3 hour trail walk then lunch.  I haven't even got the heart to look at what I'm doing after lunch or in the evening.

I love how optimistic Clark is in thinking I'll be able to get out of bed before 6am!! I guess I should have warned him I'M NOT A MORNING PERSON!!!!

I am woman, hear me roar

The above image is a take on the classic 1972 Helen Reddy song "I am woman"  I recently discovered it on a wander round Youtube.  It speaks to me on so many levels and I can understand why it became an anthem for women's rights throughout the seventies.

But it's the chorus that really resonates with me this week.

Oh yes I am wise
But it's wisdom born of pain
Yes, I've paid the price
But look how much I gained
If I have to, I can do anything
I am strong (strong)
I am invincible (invincible)
I am woman

Sometimes I believe that I can do anything.  In the last couple of weeks I've run for my club, I've learned to cycle with SPD pedals (not learned to stop yet without falling over though!!), I've been out for an 8 mile run (my longest run in 9 years) and realised a teenage ambition by becoming a biker chick!

Oh yes, I am woman! Tired but happy :-)

5x5 relay

I was brave and took part in our club's 5x5 relay on Saturday.  This event was created a couple of years ago to celebrate our 25th year.  Basically teams of 5 run a leg of approx 5 miles around Crieff and Comrie.  Each leg is very different (road, trail or hill) so it suits all kinds of runners. 

My team were The Royal Family headed by Queen Elizabeth herself!  Thanks to Kirsty who made our fab team t shirts and gave us our titles.  I'm Duchess of the Turret since my leg was running downhill from Turret Dam into Crieff. I like running down the hill!!

 It looks like I'm all alone up there but everyone else was in front of me!  Note the Sharon-esque leg pose ;-)

Phil came storming in over the hill to hand over to me in 2nd place.  I think this photo might end up in a club caption competition!!!

The relay is designed to be a fun event.  The runners fall into 2 camps.  Those who take it all very seriously and work out team tactics and those who don't (me n Charlie!) But I surprised myself.  When 3rd place Charlie caught up with me and passed me I was quite disappointed.  I really wanted to hold my 2nd place for the team.  So it was with some glee I saw that he was struggling so I pushed on and we kinda ran together for a while.  When we hit the flat I pushed on again and he couldn't keep up.  I knew he wouldn't catch me so I kept going.  I really thought I'd hold my 2nd place.

So I was quite scunnered when Colin came flying past me with about half a mile to go. He might joke that he's an Old Git (it's on the back of his hoodie!) but he's a good runner so I took comfort in only losing one place before handing over to Her Majesty who ran the final leg which is the 10k route.

It's the first time I've taken part in the event and I loved it.  And I've found there is a wee competitive streak in me! Maybe next year I'll run an uphill leg!

(photos by Liz Mestecky)

The C word

I got a row for using the C word.  As usual it was in relation to my run this morning. I sent a text to Clark saying I had managed my 5 mile run but had made the mistake of attempting to run up Laggan Hill.  I have a complete mental block when it comes to hills.  My head says I can do it and I really want to do it but my legs have a different idea. They just stop.  We have endless conversations about why this happens and so far I haven't found the answer.  So when I said I had a good run but still can't do hills I got the reply "stop using that f*cking word - it is not in my dictionary!" (the * wasn't me, you know I have no problem writing or saying fuck and all its derivatives) 

I don't know how to get round this.  Even wee gradual inclines floor me mentally.  I'm constantly seeking flat routes to run (and cycle) but as I'm increasing my mileage it's getting harder to find decent routes without just going 10 times round the block.  I'm gonna have to run up hills cos something else has started happening.  When I grind to a halt, my head fills with more than just running related crap.  I'm a half empty glass kinda person so even when there's a lot of great stuff going on I'll always be focusing on the negative.

As I walked up the hill I tried to force myself into thinking positive thoughts. I've been reading a few books on the subject but I think deep down I don't actually believe what they say.  Visualising myself running up the hill just doesn't work.  Chanting like 'the little engine who could' doesn't work either.  The thing is I'm sure I'm physically fit enough to do it now.

I could avoid hills but as I improve I'm discovering what kind of runs I like. I like off road, I like loops rather than out and back runs.  And I like running down hills.  In this weekend's upcoming club relay event I requested the run down from the dam.  5 miles straight down!

Not using the C word is simplifying the problem.  I could say I have difficulty running up hills.  But the truth is right now I can't go up hills and I don't know why.